Karma Queens? Geek Gods? Denim Dads?

I must have missed many new things in recent marketing research. Otherwise, why would I not have heard of Karma Queens, Geek Gods, Innerpreneurs, Denim Dads, and Parentocrats?

These new marketing terms are bestowed and explained by Ron Rentel and Joel Zellnik in their new book, Karma Queens, Geek Gods & Innerpreneurs. In all, the authors have created nine new consumer types to help businesses shape their marketing strategies.

And just what is a Karma Queen? According to the book's authors, a Karma Queen "is identified as a woman aged in her 40s or 50s who tends to buy organic food, wear Birkenstock footwear, practice yoga and buy high-end bath products."

Geek Gods? They are "identified as men aged under 35 who can't live without the latest gadget and are eager to help others understand their electronics. They are considered the most benevolent of the consumer types."

"Benevolent?!" Are these the same guys who were fighting over places in the iPhone lines running around the block? Are they the same guys who routinely engage in internet flame wars? Are they the same guys who never hesitate to brag about their most recent online and retail kills?

"Benevolent?" That's a downright insult to masculinity everywhere! Maybe we need a Real Man's Geek Retreat. (See below.)